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Thursday, July 23, 2009

Dairy Queen!

Warren Buffett

Yes yes yes, I know, this is a picture of Berkshire Hathaway's Warren Buffett. But he is more than one of the most famous investors of all time.

He is a part owner/investor of IDQ - International Dairy Queen - and therefore, one of my favourite people of all time. He is single-handedly bringing down communism by opening up a rash of Dairy Queen outlets in China. Who can be mad at the world when you're holding a peanut Buster parfait? How can you crave total world domination when confronted by a lip-smackingly small, dipped cone? Or desire to cripple the economic output of several small Western nations when your business gurus are holding their Brownie Batter Blizzards upside down to prove that the ice-cream don't melt easily?

I have yet to try this delicious treat

No-one can fear the man who craves the sugar rush that is DQ soft scoop. Hot fudge sundaes? Send them to North Korea! Middle East problem? Open a DQ on the Gaza Strip.

And please, for the love of all that is good in this world, Warren, baby, PLEASE open a DQ in London... preferably near Moorgate...

In other news, eating ice-cream has always had a kind of Eddie Murphy effect on the Mermaid. As soon as a DQ sign is sighted on the horizon... It's all IIIIICE CREAAAAAAAAM!!!!! IIIIIIICE CREAAAAAAAAAAM!!! And then, many sugar shakes later (where the whole body shivers and freezes while at the same time, weirdly, my whole body is alive with the rush of sugar and trans fats), I start to sing "I had an IIIIICE CREAM" before falling over on the sofa in a semi-comatose state.

On second thoughts, Warren, perhaps it's best if you keep DQ for the nations that really need ice-cream cocaine. I dread to think how my financial advice would turn out if I got high on your triple fudge, chocolate-dipped Reese's Pieces waffle cone. Sub-prime woes would be remembered with wistful fondness. Still, if it's good for the Man himself, it's gotta be good for the Mermaid?

Warren with a Blizzard

19 comments:

lilith said...

Merms, have you trapped the poor man in a cupboard?

Destiny Angel said...

Hello MerMs. You are so right!

As a wide ranging monotheist, I still touch base with a number of Muhammadans who love to refer to the God-fearing U S of A as The Great Satan.

Now their devil is not the same as yours. In fact, the difference is in the detail. As they would have it, Shaytan is not that scary red chap with the horns. Nothing so crude. Rather, he is a whispering seducer, not unlike Peter Mandelson. My Muhammadan mates insist that America is out to seduce them into western ways. And how right they are.

"Mmmmm," he whispers, "Aren't these Krispy Kremes soooo Moorish. And you've aready got the mint so, go on, have a mint julep. You know you want to. . ."

So where does DQ fit into this?

Well, in recent years under the guise of "archaeology", a nasty little holy land-grabbing operation has been taking place around the Wailing Wall of David's fair city. Opening a DQ between The Wailing Wall (ouch, brainfreeze) of Jerusalem and The Dome of the Rock of Al-Quds would do wonders for reuniting this benighted and divided city.

Not only would we have a land of milk and honey - this time there would be chopped nuts on top. It would be a win win.

After all, it's not as if I'm proposing something contentious like a opening branch of Benjemin and Jeremiah's. . .

The Economic Voice said...

Excellent research into a downfall of mine......I am a mint chocolate chip man....an excellent ice cream parlor can be found close to me in Brecon...worth a visit if in the area.

http://www.llanfaesdairy.net/

Steven_L said...

Berkshire Hathaway also own Kirby. What a bunch of absolute b******s.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Lilith! Now there is a thought - If I put him in a cupboard, I might get free D&Q for life! Although that might not be so good for the waistline. Perhaps I'll take shares in Goldman's

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Economic Voice - Interestingly (or not), I am allergic to mint choc chip ice cream, well, intolerant to it. I start retching. It's the only food/food variant that I cannot abide. Bt your local dairy parlour does sound very nice!

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Destiny Angel! How divinely lovely of you to wing by. I've missed your Edenic musings. Chopped nuts on milk and honey - perhaps with chocolate dipped manna wafers?

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Steven L - Is Kirby or Berkshire Hathaway the reason for thy discontent? Do you need a dipped waffle cone with hot fudge sauce?

john.g. said...

I'm not sure how ice-cream would react underwater! Especially sea water!

electro-kevin said...

Can't beat a Mr Whippy, I couldn't resist having one today.

Or how about a tub of good quality vanilla with a whole jar of strawberry jam tipped into it.

Oooh the headache though !

idle said...

Dunno about the dairy products but the picture of him backed into a corner of a plywood box, hugging his leg and looking vulnerable is most unlikely.

However, I bought Goldman Sachs quite cheaply after he did his Pref Share with them and thank him from the bottom of my schoolfee account.

The Economic Voice said...

"I am allergic to mint choc chip ice cream"............all the more for me :)

Scrobs... said...

Merms, since the wild strawberries stopped, we've reverted to Cadbury's choc ices on a stick...

These are addictive, and now compulsory!

In fact, our local Spar does a very nice vanilla too!

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

John G - you'd be surprised! The salt water, combined with the extreme cold and sugaricity (?) of the frozen treat forms a kind of salt-water taffy coating on everything. Like eating a toffee apple, but without the apple itself tasting soft and wrong.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Electro - seriously? Jam in Ice-cream? That sounds weird, and I am going to try it.

Which reminds me - what are Bob Marley's favourite donuts?

The ones with Jammin... ha hah aha, hem, hm.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Idle - yea, WB did well by Goldmans. How funny that the IB that slated WB's investment process on many occasion had to get bailed out by him. Bet Paulson and his crews are meekly bowing now.

Scrobs - Try freezing fresh strawberries then thawing them out just enough for the nummy juices to run, then whisk them up with some fresh cream, natural yoghurt and lemon juice for a very delectable dessert!

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Economic voice - you are welcome to MCCIC!!!


EUCK!!! BLART! ICK!!!

electro-kevin said...

Loved your comment on Scroblene's.

Do you REALLY know a Meccano expert ???

I'm going to look one of those up in Thompson's Local should we ever find ourselves in urgent need.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Hi EK! Yes, I do - Know him well - and he reads my blog every now and then... you know who you are!