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Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Think of the children

lolcats

Mermins should not be allowed near them. Children, that is.

Yesterday, Merms had been in a three-hour meeting, including lunch, at a clients HQ and then had to cram onto a late late train back to office. At Holborn, a pikey family or three with lots of small schoolchildren, pushed onto the already packed train and stood encircling me, pressing their heads into my bladder with every twist and jolt of the Central Line.

Given that matter (ie my digesting lunch) exists in three states: solid, liquid and gas, something had to give.

But I waited until it was time for me to escape the train before I farted in their general direction, head level. Some of them even had their mouths open.

Was that mean and unchristian?

11 comments:

lilith said...

I am deeply impressed by your powers of self control.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

I did hear one of them comment: "Who's been eating rice cakes"

How I laughed

Blue Eyes said...

Mer Maid's Back All Right!

Gorilla Bananas said...

If you've got to fart, fart. You certainly shouldn't hold in it for kiddies, who are used to that sort of thing. I assume you're a mistress of the silent but deadly effusions.

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

Gorilla - it was indeed, silent and deadly. I think it held up the central line for a few hours while they gave pure oxygen to the children.

Blue eyes - yup, and with a vengeance! It is good to be back on the beat! x

john.g. said...

LMAO! You cant beat a good SBD fart on the underground!

fleetofworlds said...

This is precisely the kind of thing that has resulted in my investing in a Brompton in order to avoid the tube ;-)

Welcome back Merms.

Funkmaster Geoff said...

I thought mermaids did/could not fart? In any case, I am very impressed with a certain Mermaid's ability when it comes to baking cakes. Hmmmmn. Cakes...

electro-kevin said...

Mean and unChristian ?

I've often heard the Trinity described thus:

Father, Son and Holy Ghost

Ice, water, steam respectively.

As written.

Daisy said...

mermaid...i don't believe it was unchristian...you were just teaching the young tots a lesson they were bound to need for their future train riding adventures :)

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

yes indeed - I think it was my bounden Christian duty to prepare them for life's ills. And it was a great fart too, so there's generosity thrown in...