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Friday, January 02, 2009

Nein!

One of the stories I have been editing today is about a fund manager who does skydiving in his spare time. One particular paragraph really set me about laughing, however, as I felt my editing skills put sorely to the test in the face of very inappropriate humour.

The paragraph ran thus:

‘Eric has jumped with people of all ages. “The youngest was my daughter, who I took up for her 15th birthday. The oldest was a man aged 82 who had landed on Normandy beaches during D-Day. It was very emotional for him as the jump was onto a Normandy beach.”’

I really want to edit it to read:

‘Eric has jumped with people of all ages. “The youngest was my daughter, who I took up for her 15th birthday. The oldest was a man aged 82 who had landed on Normandy beaches during D-Day. It was very emotional for him as the jump was onto a Normandy beach and we had arranged for a German soldier to be waiting for him with a Schmeisser.”’

Oh well something had to make me laugh this miserable new year.

12 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

And the soldier would have said:
"For you ze war is over, Tommy pensioner."

Cycles Goff said...

'To edit is divine.'

Next time you should make the change.

Trubes said...

Ha ha Mermies Very funny...
New year is gloomy here too!

Di.xx

Mermaid of Moorgate said...

To edit may be divine, Gimme, but I am concerned about whether my boss would see it that way!

Gorilla, I am glad to see that we all still consider the germans to be the natural enemy of the Englander. All those bridges under water (or the other way round) and we've still not let that one go.
Mind you, they didn't let Poland go...

Heya Trubes!!! Is it as freezing in the Pool as it is down in londinium????

Romeo Morningwood said...

Eric was our creepy neighbour. He was 48 and lived in his Mother's basement where he cyberstalked Britney Spears and tortured insects with magnifying glasses.

He had jumped people of all ages. The oldest was a German soldier by the name of Schmeisser aged 82. It was very emotional for him.

My youngest daughter is only 15 and naturally she is afraid of Eric.

So we arranged a hole in the space/time continuum and Eric landed on the Normandy beaches during D-Day. It was very emotional for us.

Trubes said...

It sure is freezing up here Mermies. I went out looking like Cossack dancer, yesterday, complete with baggy trousers tucked down black fur lined boots and huge hat!
It was dark so I don't think anybody recognised me...

'Yo oh heave ho'.... The song of the Volga Boatmen, as performed by the Russian Army Ensemble in the 60's...
I really must get out more!

Di.xx

Daisy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Electro-Kevin said...

You mean my Christmas video didn't cheer you up ???

(It's somewhere on my blog - I didn't realise that I sound like John Major :-(( )

The Old Tarf said...

Hey, come over here and se the ice storm and the 3 feet of snow as well. You will be glad to be in jolly old England.

We went again on sunday and it may become a regular habit.

Jon M said...

Or,"The oldest was a man aged 82 who had landed on Normandy beaches despite us flying over Weston-Super-Mare."

Anonymous said...
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Philipa said...

my take on jumping was completely different.

Perhaps the german could have a towel and the old man a Schmeisser?